Wrong Bed Baby: Crescent Cove Book 10 Read online

  “Okay, now I’m definitely not trying one of them, even if I’m alone until I’m one hundred and my girly bits wither and disintegrate.” Then she gasped again. “Oh, God, did I just say that?”

  I had to laugh. “Also the way I’m feeling right now. Sorry. My ineptitude knows no bounds lately. I blame the drugs.” That was most certainly a joke, but she didn’t know me well enough to understand the only drugs I was on were antibiotics and Advil.

  Yeah, I’d just quit while I was ahead with this one.

  “So, what’s up?” I asked, bravely forging ahead despite the many signs not to.

  “There’s this thing. Tonight.”

  Uh oh. “Uh, sorry, I probably can’t make any things.”

  “It’s on the roof.” She rushed ahead. “In that cool gathering place up there. Have you been? If not, you should come tonight. Luna is having a thing, kind of a small dinner party, but I was thinking that—”

  “Yes. Definitely. I can go.” She’d just said the magic word. Granted, it would’ve been better if Luna had invited me to her thing herself, but I wasn’t easily deterred. “What time?”

  “Oh, really?” Tabitha’s voice rose. “You can go? It’s at eight.”

  “Sure. Sounds good.”

  I immediately felt bad. I really hoped she was just being friendly. But if not, maybe I could get Lucky to help her out.

  Not like that. I wouldn’t sic my horndog best friend on a sweet, innocent woman. But he had friends who weren’t quite so openly on the make. Maybe I’d see if he could invite a couple guys to come over too, to help make up for my lack of availability.

  Assuming she wanted me, because c’mon. With my sterling track record, it was likely.

  “Can I bring someone? I mean, a guy. Or a few?”

  “Oh.”

  I hastily expanded on my question. “Not as a date. Or like a poly thing. I’m a one-woman man. At least now, since I have a new resolve.” And a healthy fear of procreation. “So, anyway, can I bring a couple friends? Attractive ones. Ones you would be happy to have at your party. Or Luna’s.”

  Not that I wanted Luna to be too happy with them, for obvious reasons.

  Tabitha said something I couldn’t quite make out, and I swallowed a groan. For fuck’s sake, what was my deal lately? I used to be smooth with women. Just not since I’d been breathing the air in the Forrester Apartments.

  “Um, sure. A couple friends should be fine. It’s not really a party, just a small get-together.”

  A call from Lucky came in. Perfect timing.

  “Got it. Just a couple people.” More chances for me to get to know Luna better, though of course I’d talk to Tabitha too. She seemed like a fun person.

  I quickly thanked Tabitha again for the invite and ended the call and switched to Lucky.

  “Hey, free tonight?”

  “Do you know how to say hello?”

  “Hello. Free tonight?”

  “Depends. If you need help matching your shams to your drapes, call a chick who cares.”

  “How do you know the word shams?” I only knew it because Kinleigh had used it today when I’d been in the shop.

  And no, I hadn’t bought any. There was a decorating point of no return, and I was certain that was it.

  “I know things, okay?”

  I smirked. “A woman told you, huh?”

  “Possibly my last girl asked me not to rip her shams while we were…conversing. What do you have in mind for tonight?”

  I explained the Tabitha situation, which made Lucky laugh hard enough to fracture something.

  “You honestly think she’s into you?”

  “Why is that so hard to believe?”

  “She could be being polite. If she wanted to put the moves on you, why didn’t she ask if she could come up to eat your toast crap?”

  “She’s shy. And it’s not ‘toast crap’, it’s French toast.”

  He snorted. “Right. I think she’s just being nice, but whatever, I can gather the boys.”

  “Not a crowd,” I warned. “She said Luna wants it to be small.”

  “Luna, Luna, Luna. You are whipped, my friend. And taking Tabitha up on her invite only to try to get in tight with Luna is sketchy as hell.”

  “I know that,” I said irritably. “Why I’m bringing you and a couple of your friends. That way she’ll have other options. Decent dudes, Lucky. Got it? Besides, I am just getting to know everyone. Not trying to have sex.”

  He started laughing again, even harder than before. “Right. I’ll see how many are available. Free booze?”

  How many was not a phrase that seemed to indicate a couple friends. “Like two. Max three. And yeah, I assume there will be alcohol—”

  He hung up.

  I frowned and stared at my phone. Already I was getting a bad feeling about this. I should never have trusted Lucky to invite a few guys. We had many of the same friends, and I’d taken a shortcut to avoid texting people because I’d wanted to empty a few more boxes before I headed upstairs. I wasn’t finished unpacking.

  Eh, too late to worry about it now. He’d figure it out. Besides, it was short notice, so how many guys could he round up that fast?

  Answer: a hell of a lot, as I found out a few hours later.

  I managed to get through the contents of a bunch more boxes and then showered off the dust and sweat before pulling on some khaki shorts and a T-shirt. As my hair drip dried over my shoulders, I remembered I’d intended to make an appointment to get it cut, since school would be starting in a little over a month.

  Before that, I’d have administration days and meetings and all that fun stuff and I’d have to tuck my Wildman Jack look away until next year. Winter break wasn’t long enough to go full-on bearded or to let my hair go. The curls were out of control in this humidity, and hell if I used product in it. I was about ready to shave all the shit off.

  I stopped in the kitchen to grab a bottle of…well, not wine, since apparently, I didn’t have any. Why hadn’t I gone grocery shopping yet? I didn’t even have beer, a fact I’d not noticed until this very moment.

  What I did have was a dubious looking bottle of coconut rum. I didn’t know where it had come from. I certainly didn’t drink that stuff. But it was rude not to bring an offering, and I was already running late.

  Hmm, maybe Lucky could—

  Nah, I’d asked him for enough already. Last thing I needed was for him to bring a keg to Luna’s shindig.

  To try to make the rum look like a better hostess gift, I slapped a bow on the side of the bottle that had fallen out of a box of Christmas crap and been trampled underfoot. I rubbed the footprint off and tried to perk it up then shrugged.

  It was the thought that counted, right?

  I tucked it under my arm and stepped out into the hallway, smiling as I heard the music coming from upstairs. It wasn’t loud, just enough to indicate people were enjoying themselves.

  Hopefully, I would too.

  I grimaced as I headed down the hall then upstairs to the roof. My foot looked stupid with my bandaged toe sticking out of my sandal but it was too damn hot for real shoes. Not to mention I wasn’t stuffing it into a toe box quite yet.

  Just before I opened the door, the music switched to that Luna-style sexy stuff that had lured me the first time I saw her.

  I grinned. Auspicious sign.

  I opened the door and blinked at the softly lit space. There were colorful pillows and flickering candles and that low, erotic music offset by easy feminine laughter. A few women were roaming around or clustered near each other in the oversized round chairs that doubled for sun worshipping. The table held a serious spread of food, most of it light and summer-friendly. A lot of watermelon and delicate finger food.

  My stomach growled. Where were the meat and potatoes?

  Then Luna stepped forward in a loose romper-looking one-piece thing the exact color of the cantaloupe in the fruit platter, and I forgot all of my hunger needs except one in particular.


  For her, backlit by candles and with the breeze fluttering in her long hair.

  Surprise made her smile falter. “Caleb? What are you doing here?”

  Tabitha popped up from a seat near the wall that surrounded the rooftop space. “I invited him. Hope that’s okay. And…oh.” She lifted her hand to her mouth on a self-conscious laugh. “Guess I was too late there, huh?”

  I didn’t know what she meant, but I made an effort to drag my gaze from Luna long enough to smile at Tabitha. “Hey. Thanks for inviting me. Sorry I’m late.” I held out the bottle of rum toward Luna, who arched a brow.

  “Is this your drink of choice?” She took the bottle from me, eyeing it with...not distaste exactly, but definitely not with excitement.

  So, she wasn’t a rum chick. Noted.

  “No, it’s a hostess gift. For your party,” I explained when she continued to examine the bottle.

  “For my party?” She glanced at Tabitha before looking at the bottle again. “How kind of you. Imagine if you’d delivered it before the best by date of,” she bit her lip, “June 2015.”

  I cleared my throat. “You know how liquor is. I let that age.”

  “Hmm. Yeah, thanks.” She set the bottle on the floor under the table.

  Defiantly, I bent to pick it up and grabbed a colorful glass from the stack of them. “I’ll have it then. This is the good stuff.”

  “By all means. Start us off.” She waved her fingers at me, and I was nearly certain she was trying not to laugh. As was Tabitha.

  I filled a glass and tossed it back shot-style, figuring it would hurt less if it went down fast. The sickly sweet alcohol burned when it hit my stomach, and I nearly gagged from the over-the-top, well, girlishness of it. I didn’t know any dudes who would drink this.

  Hell, I didn’t know why I was drinking it.

  But it didn’t stop me from exaggeratedly smacking my lips as I tipped more into my glass. “Damn, tastes even better than I remembered. Bottoms up,” I managed before I gulped down more rum.

  “You are a game one.” Her smile softened around the edges as she shifted to look at Tabitha. “Did you invite anyone else?”

  Her cheeks reddened. “No, just Caleb. I didn’t know I shouldn’t.”

  Luna waved a hand. “It’s perfectly fine. This is the spot for neighbors to get to know each other. It’s not a huge building. We’ll be in and out of each other’s pockets whether we want to be or not.”

  Well, that didn’t sound particularly promising, but I was a guy who preferred to look on the optimistic side. “Yes, and sometimes you just need a couple of pieces of bread.”

  At Luna’s questioning look, Tabitha explained my visit.

  Luna let out a light laugh. “If you need bakery goods, she’s the door to knock on. She owns Sugar Rush. Best Half Moon cookies you’ll ever taste. We take those cookies very seriously in the Cove.”

  “Aww, thanks, Luna. And if you want incredible tarot readings, great fashion tips or creepy true crime tidbits, she’s your woman.” Tabitha shook her head. “Guess you have that in common.”

  “Which one?” Luna asked curiously, her sexy blue eyes sparkling in the candlelight. “Let me guess. The fashion tips? Do you know of any hot new designers or have any tattoos in interesting places?” Her voice turned into a purr on that last part.

  Not that I needed any encouragement from her direction to get harder than stone.

  When I didn’t immediately reply, she shifted to toe off her sandals, angling her body just enough for me to glimpse what appeared to be a daisy tattoo high on the back of her thigh.

  My mouth went dry, leaving me no choice but to gulp more rum.

  “I’m not big on fashion, but I’m a fan of tattoos and especially true crime. You’d be surprised how many ways you can brutally kill your neighbor with common household items.”

  As Tabitha covered her mouth, I drank more rum in the hopes of shutting myself up.

  Luna, however, seemed amused. “Oh, you must be a fan of Asher’s podcast then. You have to meet Bess. She’s his—” She broke off and blinked down at my foot. “What happened to you?”

  I swallowed repeatedly to try to get that hellfire taste out of my mouth. “Huh?”

  Luna crouched in front of me to lift my leg. She eased my sandal off and propped my foot on a chair before touching it gently.

  I swayed and it wasn’t entirely from my lack of balance. Her touch felt like heaven. “Nail.” I could barely speak.

  “Oh, no. Your bandage is frayed. I can fix you up better than this.” She stroked the side of my foot and I swayed again, because now my balance was affected by the urgent weight between my damn legs. If I didn’t topple over, it would be a miracle.

  What was it with this…goddess? That was the only appropriate word. Even her golden hair appeared to be glowing in the shimmering light.

  “We can go—” She didn’t get anything else out, because a sudden clattering of feet climbing the stairs disturbed the low-key environment.

  My head was swimming from a mixture of rum and Luna, but I knew without a doubt that I’d made a serious error in judgment.

  Not the first time when it came to my best friend. Probably not the last either.

  I would never, ever fucking learn.

  The door to the roof burst open and Lucky appeared, flanked by a whole heck of a lot more than a couple friends.

  More than half a dozen. In fact, I was pretty sure the stairwell was clogged with quite a few of Crescent Cove’s bravest. Maybe some of the finest too.

  Didn’t want to leave out any of the first responders, after all.

  Luna’s mouth dropped open as she rose and stared hard at me before swinging her gaze back to Lucky and his band of loud-as-hell merry men. “What is all this?”

  Lucky held up a six-pack and motioned to the crowd behind him. “We came to party, womenfolk!”

  Five

  Belatedly, I remembered that chaos followed Lucky wherever he went. Usually because he invited it and fed it slices of watermelon and shots of tequila.

  In this case, he doled out a lot of both, acting as a master of ceremonies of sorts although he had not been invited by the woman holding the gathering. She hadn’t invited me either, and from the looks she occasionally slid my way as she tried to salvage the night, she had not forgotten that tidbit.

  “So, our fair Tabitha invited you, you said?”

  Glumly, I poked at my watercress and cucumber mini sandwich with the plastic skewer I’d stolen off a drink. Not mine, since I was trying to slow down. I hadn’t had all that much, all things considered, but after pounding that straight rum, I’d begun at a distinct disadvantage. Add in that whole lack of tolerance thing and I didn’t feel too hot.

  And so far, I’d spent most of my time talking to Bess Wainwright, a woman who was at least forty years older than me. She was lovely, no doubt about that, and she had a sharp wit and a great sense of humor, but she wasn’t really in my target group.

  “Yeah.” I ate some of the watercress and decided it wasn’t as awful as I’d assumed. Though I’d really prefer a steak. “She’s nice.”

  Bess was eating far more enthusiastically than I was. She speared a cube of honeydew with her fork. “She is. Not for you, hmm?”

  In lieu of answering, I lifted my head to glance where Tabitha was leaning against the wall, a smile on her face as she spoke to Brady, the newest member of our police force. She was popping green grapes in her mouth as she chatted animatedly. I wondered if she realized he was watching the path of the fruit from the tips of her fingers until she bit down. That little flash of tongue before she chewed and swallowed.

  It would’ve been an almost unintentionally erotic display, if my dick hadn’t been in the midst of a depressive episode. My toe was too. Ever since Luna had stroked my foot and then abandoned me to the vagaries of my raggedy bandage, it had felt cold and sore. And since the temperature had to be in the mid-eighties even now that it was after nine pm, that said plenty.
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  Bess turned her head to follow my gaze and she nodded sympathetically. “Scooped by a man in uniform.” She made a noise that reminded me of what my cousin’s cat did at the window when she was trying to lure birds into her den. “Such a handsome one too. Look at how that shirt fits him.”

  “They buy them all a size too small so their muscles bulge.” There was no keeping the irritation out of my voice.

  Bess laughed and poured from a pitcher of some fruity drink with a decidedly alcoholic scent into her glass. “Our honorable firemen too? They also fill out their attire quite well. Not that you have anything to feel bad about in that department, Cal.”

  “Caleb,” I corrected. “Only my mother calls me Cal, and she’s not allowed to either.”

  “Noted.” She didn’t laugh openly, but I heard it in her voice.

  I didn’t blame her. I’d laugh at me too right now if it didn’t make my head swim.

  “Why do I have a feeling you aren’t over here drowning your sorrows in cucumbers because of Tabitha’s appreciation for the men in blue?”

  “No. I brought her that man,” I mumbled.

  Bess’s dark brown brow arched. “You run a male delivery service? Can I place an order? I just want one for an hour.” She tapped her chin with fingers winking with sparkly rings. “Or two. Then he can run along home. Much easier that way.”

  I had to chuckle. “Actually, Lucky brought all these dudes.” I gestured around us.

  The rooftop area was pretty packed. Most everyone had broken off into couples or groups to talk and laugh. Bodies pressed close flirtatiously. Some people were even dancing.

  Not me. With my toe, I’d probably somehow pitch myself off the roof.

  Then again, a lawsuit might set me up for life. Forrester had the cash to spare. Assuming Luna didn’t tell anyone how much questionable rum I’d consumed like a dumbass beforehand.

  “He didn’t stay in school long enough to learn how to count very well,” I added, chewing on a piece of cucumber since it was there. “I said a couple. Max three.”

  “Seems like he tacked a zero onto the end of that number,” she said drily.